#61 A high tide means Chuck Norris is flying over your coast. The tide is caused by God pissing his pants.
#63 When in a bar, you can order a drink called a "Chuck Norris". It is also known as a "Bloody Mary", if your name happens to be Mary.
#65 When Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes its hide. When Chuck Norris kills a ninja, he uses every part.
#66 Chuck Norris does not have to answer the phone. His beard picks up the incoming electrical impulses and translates them into audible sound.
#70 How many roundhouse kicks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Just one. From Chuck Norris.
#73 In ancient China there is a legend that one day a child will be born from a dragon, grow to be a man, and vanquish evil from the land. That man is not Chuck Norris, because Chuck Norris killed that man.