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Chuck Norris owns a chain of fast-food restaurants throughout the southwest. They serve nothing but barbecue-flavored ice cream and Hot Pockets.
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#643
Chuck Norris can milk ground beef from a cow.
#591
Chuck Norris can install a 64 bit OS on 32 bit machines.
#471
Chuck Norris has volunteered to remain on earth after the Rapture; he will spend his time fighting the Anti-Christ.
#80
Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.
#143
While urinating, Chuck Norris is easily capable of welding titanium.
#72
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
#288
Chuck Norris once went skydiving, but promised never to do it again. One Grand Canyon is enough.
#101
If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.
#360
Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.
#382
Chuck Norris qualified with a top speed of 324 mph at the Daytona 500, without a car.
#647
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.
#5
The opening scene of the movie "Saving Private Ryan" is loosely based on games of dodgeball Chuck Norris played in second grade.
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