When Chuck Norris was a baby, he didn't suck his mother's breast. His mother served him whiskey, straight out of the bottle.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#595

Chuck Norris never has to build his program to machine code. Machines have learnt to interpret Chuck Norris code.

#90

In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.

#266

How many Chuck Norris' does it take to change a light bulb? None, Chuck Norris prefers to kill in the dark.

#546

Chuck Norris programs do not accept input.

#178

Thousands of years ago Chuck Norris came across a bear. It was so terrified that it fled north into the arctic. It was also so terrified that all of its decendents now have white hair.

#124

Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.

#634

Tornados occur when Chuck Norris sneezes.

#627

Chuck Norris once pissed in a gas tank of a semi truck as a joke - that truck is now know as Optimus Prime.

#120

Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.

#210

Chuck Norris does not style his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror.

#134

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? All of it.

#315

The phrase 'balls to the wall' was originally conceived to describe Chuck Norris entering any building smaller than an aircraft hangar.