Never look a gift Chuck Norris in the mouth, because he will bite your damn eyes off.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#387

Think of a hot woman. Chuck Norris did her.

#361

All roads lead to Chuck Norris. And by the transitive property, a roundhouse kick to the face.

#416

A movie scene depicting Chuck Norris losing a fight with Bruce Lee was the product of history's most expensive visual effect. When adjusted for inflation, the effect cost more than the Gross National Product of Paraguay.

#556

Chuck Norris solved the halting problem.

#225

Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

#510

Chuck Norris can unit test entire applications with a single assert.

#182

Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

#690

Chuck Norris caught a bullet by blinking.

#629

Chuck Norris can stand on his head. His dick-head.

#656

Chuck Norris can go past the Character limit.

#368

The First rule of Chuck Norris is: you do not talk about Chuck Norris.

#286

Sticks and stones may break your bones, but a Chuck Norris glare will liquefy your kidneys.