Never look a gift Chuck Norris in the mouth, because he will bite your damn eyes off.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#741

Chuck Norris can suck a garden hose through a golf ball.

#54

Chuck Norris' programs can pass the Turing Test by staring at the interrogator.

#744

Chuck Norris once ran around the Earth so fast he was able to roundhouse kick himself in the ass.

#308

The phrase 'break a leg' was originally coined by Chuck Norris' co-stars in Walker, Texas Ranger as a good luck charm, indicating that a broken leg might be the worst extent of their injuries. This never proved to be the case.

#256

Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

#542

Chuck Norris insists on strongly-typed programming languages.

#694

When Chuck Norris lifts weights, the dumbells get tired.

#258

It is scientifically impossible for Chuck Norris to have had a mortal father. The most popular theory is that he went back in time and fathered himself.

#448

They say curiosity killed the cat. This is false. Chuck Norris killed the cat. Every single one of them.

#638

Chuck Norris puts sunglasses on to protect the sun from his eyes.

#411

When Chuck Norris goes to out to eat, he orders a whole chicken, but he only eats its soul.

#183

Chuck Norris once worked as a weatherman for the San Diego evening news. Every night he would make the same forecast: Partly cloudy with a 75% chance of Pain.