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Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.
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#90
In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.
#656
Chuck Norris can go past the Character limit.
#184
Simply by pulling on both ends, Chuck Norris can stretch diamonds back into coal.
#726
Chuck Norris doesn't have good aim. His bullets just know better than to miss.
#442
Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
#503
Project managers never ask Chuck Norris for estimations... ever.
#681
Chuck Norris CAN talk about fight club.
#382
Chuck Norris qualified with a top speed of 324 mph at the Daytona 500, without a car.
#212
A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart disease, 2. Chuck Norris, 3. Cancer
#532
There is no Esc key on Chuck Norris' keyboard, because no one escapes Chuck Norris.
#634
Tornados occur when Chuck Norris sneezes.
#405
The word 'Kill' was invented by Chuck Norris. Other words were 'Die', 'Beer', and 'What'.
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