Every time Chuck Norris smiles, someone dies. Unless he smiles while he's roundhouse kicking someone in the face. Then two people die.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#626

Chuck Norris doesn't need a keyboard he tells the computer to write something and it does.

#93

Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse. Horses are hung like Chuck Norris.

#436

Chuck Norris has banned rainbows from the state of North Dakota.

#492

Chuck Norris writes code that optimizes itself.

#273

Chuck Norris is the only person to ever win a staring contest against Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder.

#211

There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.

#647

Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.

#229

When Chuck Norris was a baby, he didn't suck his mother's breast. His mother served him whiskey, straight out of the bottle.

#636

Chuck Norris made the sun by rubbing his hands together.

#67

The dinosaurs looked at Chuck Norris the wrong way once. You know what happened to them.

#83

Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.

#683

Miss Daisy drove Chuck Norris.