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Roundhouse your way through
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Every time Chuck Norris smiles, someone dies. Unless he smiles while he's roundhouse kicking someone in the face. Then two people die.
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#517
Chuck Norris doesn't need a debugger, he just stares down the bug until the code confesses.
#88
Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he only takes blood baths.
#333
Chuck Norris' first job was as a paperboy. There were no survivors.
#105
Chuck Norris doesn't wash his clothes. He disembowels them.
#72
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
#153
When you're Chuck Norris, anything + anything is equal to 1. One roundhouse kick to the face.
#376
Most people fear the Reaper. Chuck Norris considers him "a promising Rookie".
#135
Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
#739
Chuck Norris can kill seven with one blow. By literally blowing on them.
#15
Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and craps gunpowder. Then, he uses that gunpowder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky. Some people refer to this as the "Circle of Life.
#686
Chuck Norris can look at you in a tone of voice.
#117
Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.
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