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Roundhouse your way through
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Every time Chuck Norris smiles, someone dies. Unless he smiles while he's roundhouse kicking someone in the face. Then two people die.
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#262
That's not Chuck Norris doing push-ups -- that's Chuck Norris moving the Earth away from the path of a deadly asteroid.
#223
Chuck Norris won super bowls VII and VIII singlehandedly before unexpectedly retiring to pursue a career in ass-kicking.
#332
The only sure things are Death and Taxes and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.
#109
What was going through the minds of all of Chuck Norris' victims before they died? His shoe.
#392
Aliens DO indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Chuck Norris is on.
#212
A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart disease, 2. Chuck Norris, 3. Cancer
#674
Chuck Norris did it his way and Sinatra sang about it.
#639
Chuck Norris can lock a safe and keep the key inside it.
#688
If Chuck Norris were a vegetable he'd be a Chuck Norris.
#731
Chuck Norris can cut through steak with a plastic spoon.
#155
On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.
#542
Chuck Norris insists on strongly-typed programming languages.
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