Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse. Horses are hung like Chuck Norris.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#554

Chuck Norris doesn't use a computer because a computer does everything slower than Chuck Norris.

#319

The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry. Even the worst-laid plans of Chuck Norris come off without a hitch.

#142

When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.

#255

Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.

#92

Faster than a speeding bullet... More powerful than a locomotive... Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound... These are some of Chuck Norris' warm-up exercises.

#456

The term "Cleveland Steamer" got its name from Chuck Norris, when he took a dump while visiting the Rock and Roll Hall of fame and buried northern Ohio under a glacier of fecal matter.

#228

Chuck Norris cannot love, he can only not kill.

#127

When Chuck Norris was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendy's.

#409

Who let the dogs out? Chuck Norris let the dogs out... and then roundhouse kicked them through an Oldsmobile.

#706

When Chuck Norris turned 18, his parents moved out.

#423

Chuck Norris doesn't daydream. He's too busy giving other people nightmares.

#99

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool Chuck Norris once and he will roundhouse kick you in the face.