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Roundhouse your way through
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Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he only takes blood baths.
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#683
Miss Daisy drove Chuck Norris.
#321
Staring at Chuck Norris for extended periods of time without proper eye protection will cause blindess, and possibly foot sized brusies on the face.
#523
Bill Gates thinks he's Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris actually laughed. Once.
#744
Chuck Norris once ran around the Earth so fast he was able to roundhouse kick himself in the ass.
#25
When Chuck Norris says "More cowbell", he MEANS it.
#666
Chuck Norris' bones break sticks and stones.
#89
Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell "What The Hell was That?"
#103
Chuck Norris will attain statehood in 2009. His state flower will be the Magnolia.
#347
Jack Bauer tried to use his detailed knowledge of torture techniques, but to no avail: Chuck Norris thrives on pain. Chuck Norris then ripped off Jack Bauer's arm and beat him to death with it. Game, set, match.
#709
Chuck Norris can rip a page out of Facebook.
#507
Chuck Norris doesn't do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts.
#401
Chuck Norris is the only person who can simultaneously hold and fire FIVE Uzis: One in each hand, one in each foot -- and the 5th one he roundhouse-kicks into the air, so that it sprays bullets.
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