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Roundhouse your way through
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Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he only takes blood baths.
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#395
Some people ask for a Kleenex when they sneeze, Chuck Norris asks for a body bag.
#398
Chuck Norris starts everyday with a protein shake made from Carnation Instant Breakfast, one dozen eggs, pure Colombian cocaine, and rattlesnake venom. He injects it directly into his neck with a syringe.
#636
Chuck Norris made the sun by rubbing his hands together.
#668
Chuck Norris once thought he was wrong. He was, however, mistaken.
#133
When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it won't be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.
#728
Chuck Norris has won the lifetime achievement award...twice.
#108
Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
#630
There was never anything wrong with Achilles' heel until he got mad and decided to kick Chuck Norris.
#207
Chuck Norris doesn't step on toes. Chuck Norris steps on necks.
#272
It is better to give than to receive. This is especially true of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
#418
They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but there was a problem-- It wouldn't take shit from anybody.
#279
Chuck Norris does not eat. Food understands that the only safe haven from Chuck Norris' fists is inside his own body.
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