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Roundhouse your way through
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Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb. On his penis.
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#396
There's an order to the universe: space, time, Chuck Norris.... Just kidding, Chuck Norris is first.
#630
There was never anything wrong with Achilles' heel until he got mad and decided to kick Chuck Norris.
#700
Guns are warned not to play with Chuck Norris.
#683
Miss Daisy drove Chuck Norris.
#306
How many roundhouse kicks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Just one. From Chuck Norris.
#179
Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
#176
James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator. However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
#421
Chuck Norris' sperm can be seen with the naked eye. Each one is the size of a quarter.
#382
Chuck Norris qualified with a top speed of 324 mph at the Daytona 500, without a car.
#314
Guantuanamo Bay, Cuba, is the military code-word for "Chuck Norris' basement"
#516
Chuck Norris doesn't need sudo, he just types "Chuck Norris" before his commands.
#145
When Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes its hide. When Chuck Norris kills a ninja, he uses every part.
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