Industrial logging isn't the cause of deforestation. Chuck Norris needs toothpicks. 277 227 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 55% approval (504 votes)
A high tide means Chuck Norris is flying over your coast. The tide is caused by God pissing his pants.
Chuck Norris appeared in the ‘Street Fighter II’ video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this “glitch,” Chuck Norris replied, “That’s no glitch.”
Chuck Norris brushes his teeth with a mixture of iron shavings, industrial paint remover, and wood-grain alcohol.
The last thing you hear before Chuck Norris gives you a roundhouse kick? No one knows because dead men tell no tales.
In ancient China there is a legend that one day a child will be born from a dragon, grow to be a man, and vanquish evil from the land. That man is not Chuck Norris, because Chuck Norris killed that man.
Chuck Norris is widely predicted to be first black president. If you're thinking to yourself, "But Chuck Norris isn't black", then you are dead wrong. And stop being a racist.
The movie "Delta Force" was extremely hard to make because Chuck had to downplay his abilities. The first few cuts were completely unbelievable.
When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it won't be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.