That's not Chuck Norris doing push-ups -- that's Chuck Norris moving the Earth away from the path of a deadly asteroid.

326 302

More Chuck Norris facts

#341

70% of a human's weight is water. 70% of Chuck Norris' weight is his dick.

#175

Chuck Norris once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.

#568

Chuck Norris can dereference NULL.

#482

When you play Monopoly with Chuck Norris, you do not pass go, and you do not collect two hundred dollars. You will be lucky if you make it out alive.

#683

Miss Daisy drove Chuck Norris.

#536

Chuck Norris went out of an infinite loop.

#605

Only Chuck Norris shuts down websites without due process, not SOPA or PIPA.

#332

The only sure things are Death and Taxes and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.

#716

Before he forgot a gift for Chuck Norris, Santa Claus was real.

#592

Chuck Norris doesn't have pubic hairs because hair doesn't grow on balls of steel.

#670

Cats are allergic to Chuck Norris.

#61

Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.