Chuck Norris doesn't win, he allows you to lose.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#279

Chuck Norris does not eat. Food understands that the only safe haven from Chuck Norris' fists is inside his own body.

#345

Noah was the only man notified before Chuck Norris relieved himself in the Atlantic Ocean.

#647

Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.

#169

It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

#323

Chuck Norris does not kick ass and take names. In fact, Chuck Norris kicks ass and assigns the corpse a number. It is currently recorded to be in the billions.

#444

When Chuck Norris makes a burrito, its main ingredient is real toes.

#386

Chuck Norris' credit cards have no limit. Last weekend, he maxed them out.

#726

Chuck Norris doesn't have good aim. His bullets just know better than to miss.

#515

To Chuck Norris, everything contains a vulnerability.

#248

The US did not boycott the 1980 Summer Olympics in Moscow due to political reasons: Chuck Norris killed the entire US team with a single round-house kick during TaeKwonDo practice.

#264

Nothing can escape the gravity of a black hole, except for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris eats black holes. They taste like chicken.

#717

The flu gets a Chuck Norris shot every year.