According to the Bible, God created the universe in six days. Before that, Chuck Norris created God by snapping his fingers. 347 265 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 57% approval (612 votes)
CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.
In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job". That is the story of the universe.
Human cloning is outlawed because of Chuck Norris, because then it would be possible for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to meet another Chuck Norris roundhouse kick. Physicists theorize that this contact would end the universe.
The First Law of Thermodynamics states that energy can neither be created nor destroyed... unless it meets Chuck Norris.
According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
According to the Encyclopedia Brittanica, the Native American "Trail of Tears" has been redefined as anywhere that Chuck Norris walks.
Chuck Norris can be unlocked on the hardest level of Tekken. But only Chuck Norris is skilled enough to unlock himself. Then he roundhouse kicks the Playstation back to Japan.