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Most people fear the Reaper. Chuck Norris considers him "a promising Rookie".
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#169
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
#139
The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
#575
Each hair in Chuck Norris' beard contributes to make the world's largest DDOS.
#684
Chuck Norris can see ultra-violet light.
#266
How many Chuck Norris' does it take to change a light bulb? None, Chuck Norris prefers to kill in the dark.
#717
The flu gets a Chuck Norris shot every year.
#96
Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill.
#670
Cats are allergic to Chuck Norris.
#165
Chuck Norris can drink an entire gallon of milk in thirty-seven seconds.
#251
Chuck Norris began selling the Total Gym as an ill-fated attempt to make his day-to-day opponents less laughably pathetic.
#642
Chuck Norris can hear the speed of light.
#658
Chuck Norris can eat one pringle.
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