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Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill.
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#299
Maslow's theory of higher needs does not apply to Chuck Norris. He only has two needs: killing people and finding people to kill.
#249
Chuck Norris wears a live rattlesnake as a condom.
#106
Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.
#511
Chuck Norris doesn't bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing.
#774
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird!
#463
Chuck Norris plays racquetball with a waffle iron and a bowling ball.
#686
Chuck Norris can look at you in a tone of voice.
#150
Chuck Norris always knows the EXACT location of Carmen SanDiego.
#601
Chuck Norris can download emails with his pick-up.
#466
Count from one to ten. That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you...Forty seven times.
#308
The phrase 'break a leg' was originally coined by Chuck Norris' co-stars in Walker, Texas Ranger as a good luck charm, indicating that a broken leg might be the worst extent of their injuries. This never proved to be the case.
#87
The Chuck Norris military unit was not used in the game Civilization 4, because a single Chuck Norris could defeat the entire combined nations of the world in one turn.
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