Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#406

The 11th commandment is "Thou shalt not piss off Chuck Norris". This commandment is rarely enforced, as it is impossible to accomplish.

#398

Chuck Norris starts everyday with a protein shake made from Carnation Instant Breakfast, one dozen eggs, pure Colombian cocaine, and rattlesnake venom. He injects it directly into his neck with a syringe.

#591

Chuck Norris can install a 64 bit OS on 32 bit machines.

#305

Chuck Norris does not have to answer the phone. His beard picks up the incoming electrical impulses and translates them into audible sound.

#619

Once Chuck Norris and Superman had a competition. The loser had to wear his underwear over his pants.

#606

Chuck Norris does not need a watch, he decides what time it is.

#527

No statement can catch the ChuckNorrisException.

#355

Chuck Norris never has to wax his skis because they're always slick with blood.

#67

The dinosaurs looked at Chuck Norris the wrong way once. You know what happened to them.

#111

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

#732

Chuck Norris hit 11 out of 10 targets, with 9 bullets.

#537

If Chuck Norris writes code with bugs, the bugs fix themselves.