Chuck Norris began selling the Total Gym as an ill-fated attempt to make his day-to-day opponents less laughably pathetic.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#608

Once a police officer caught Chuck Norris, the cop was lucky enough to escape with a warning.

#115

The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.

#261

Chuck Norris shot the sheriff, but he round house kicked the deputy.

#707

Some people can piss their name in to snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name in to concrete.

#500

Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move.

#14

Tom Clancy has to pay royalties to Chuck Norris because "The Sum of All Fears" is the name of Chuck Norris' autobiography.

#361

All roads lead to Chuck Norris. And by the transitive property, a roundhouse kick to the face.

#400

Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.

#455

Love does not hurt. Chuck Norris does.

#478

Rules of fighting: 1) Don't bring a knife to a gun fight. 2) Don't bring a gun to a Chuck Norris fight.

#35

If you rearrange the letters in "Chuck Norris", they also spell "Crush Rock In". The words "with his fists" are understood.

#481

Chuck Norris wipes his ass with chain mail and sandpaper.