Chuck Norris began selling the Total Gym as an ill-fated attempt to make his day-to-day opponents less laughably pathetic.

318 313

More Chuck Norris facts

#667

The French talk to Chuck Norris in English.

#541

Chuck Norris' programs never exit, they terminate.

#704

Chuck Norris has a vacation home on the sun.

#352

It is said that looking into Chuck Norris' eyes will reveal your future. Unfortunately, everybody's future is always the same: death by a roundhouse-kick to the face.

#600

Chuck Norris causes the Windows Blue Screen of Death.

#348

Chuck Norris eats steak for every single meal. Most times he forgets to kill the cow.

#135

Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.

#666

Chuck Norris' bones break sticks and stones.

#707

Some people can piss their name in to snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name in to concrete.

#175

Chuck Norris once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.

#29

Chuck Norris kills anyone that asks: "Do you want fries with that?". Because by now everyone should know that Chuck doesn't want fries with anything. Ever.

#53

Chuck Norris' database has only one table, 'Kick', which he DROPs frequently.