Chuck Norris began selling the Total Gym as an ill-fated attempt to make his day-to-day opponents less laughably pathetic.

318 313

More Chuck Norris facts

#678

The Dead Sea was once alive before Chuck Norris bathed there.

#570

A diff between your code and Chuck Norris' is infinite.

#99

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool Chuck Norris once and he will roundhouse kick you in the face.

#220

Chuck Norris doesn't play god. Playing is for children.

#554

Chuck Norris doesn't use a computer because a computer does everything slower than Chuck Norris.

#439

After returning from World War 2 unscrathed, Bob Dole was congratulated by Chuck Norris with a handshake. The rest is history.

#61

Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.

#396

There's an order to the universe: space, time, Chuck Norris.... Just kidding, Chuck Norris is first.

#655

Chuck Norris once beat a wall at tennis.

#217

Ninjas want to grow up to be just like Chuck Norris. But usually they grow up just to be killed by Chuck Norris.

#205

Chuck Norris proved that we are alone in the universe. We weren't before his first space expedition.

#607

Chuck Norris already went to Moon and Mars, that's why there are no signs of life.