There's an order to the universe: space, time, Chuck Norris.... Just kidding, Chuck Norris is first.

350 304

More Chuck Norris facts

#332

The only sure things are Death and Taxes and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.

#613

Chuck Norris can make onions cry.

#285

Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are known today as Giraffes.

#228

Chuck Norris cannot love, he can only not kill.

#33

Coroners refer to dead people as "ABC's". Already Been Chucked.

#566

Chuck Norris doesn't use GUI, he prefers COMMAND line.

#645

Chuck Norris can kill your imaginary friends.

#324

One time, Chuck Norris accidentally stubbed his toe. It destroyed the entire state of Ohio.

#244

Chuck Norris brushes his teeth with a mixture of iron shavings, industrial paint remover, and wood-grain alcohol.

#373

Every time someone uses the word "intense", Chuck Norris always replies "you know what else is intense?" followed by a roundhouse kick to the face.

#463

Chuck Norris plays racquetball with a waffle iron and a bowling ball.

#154

Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.