Chuck Norris writes code that optimizes itself.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#608

Once a police officer caught Chuck Norris, the cop was lucky enough to escape with a warning.

#281

Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.

#338

There are two types of people in the world... people that suck, and Chuck Norris.

#605

Only Chuck Norris shuts down websites without due process, not SOPA or PIPA.

#103

Chuck Norris will attain statehood in 2009. His state flower will be the Magnolia.

#617

Chuck Norris can drown a fish.

#559

With Chuck Norris P = NP. There's no nondeterminism with Chuck Norris decisions.

#295

The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris. The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction. No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.

#178

Thousands of years ago Chuck Norris came across a bear. It was so terrified that it fled north into the arctic. It was also so terrified that all of its decendents now have white hair.

#658

Chuck Norris can eat one pringle.

#139

The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.

#732

Chuck Norris hit 11 out of 10 targets, with 9 bullets.