Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead. 345 318 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 52% approval (663 votes)
Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.
A handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
That's not Chuck Norris doing push-ups -- that's Chuck Norris moving the Earth away from the path of a deadly asteroid.
What many people dont know is Chuck Norris is the founder of planned parenthood. Not even unborn children can escape his wrath.
Kryptonite has been found to contain trace elements of Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks to the face. This is why it is so deadly to Superman.