When Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes its hide. When Chuck Norris kills a ninja, he uses every part.

362 336

More Chuck Norris facts

#643

Chuck Norris can milk ground beef from a cow.

#596

Chuck Norris' unit tests don't run. They die.

#772

Condoms wear Chuck Norris for protection.

#88

Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he only takes blood baths.

#500

Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move.

#129

A Chuck Norris-delivered Roundhouse Kick is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.

#120

Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.

#166

Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his mother's womb.

#651

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.

#350

Chuck Norris doesn't go on the internet, he has every internet site stored in his memory. He refreshes webpages by blinking.

#446

In the movie "The Matrix", Chuck Norris is the Matrix. If you pay close attention in the green "falling code" scenes, you can make out the faint texture of his beard.

#123

When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn't get charged. He holds up the phone and money falls out.