When Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes its hide. When Chuck Norris kills a ninja, he uses every part.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#527

No statement can catch the ChuckNorrisException.

#740

Chuck Norris once took LSD just to give his hallucinations a bad trip.

#67

The dinosaurs looked at Chuck Norris the wrong way once. You know what happened to them.

#428

Diamonds are not, despite popular belief, carbon. They are, in fact, Chuck Norris fecal matter. This was proven a recently, when scientific analysis revealed what appeared to be Jean-Claude Van Damme bone fragments inside the Hope Diamond.

#123

When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn't get charged. He holds up the phone and money falls out.

#215

Along with his black belt, Chuck Norris often chooses to wear brown shoes. No one has DARED call him on it. Ever.

#389

Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.

#116

When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.

#432

Chuck Norris once rode a bull, and nine months later it had a calf.

#240

Fear is not the only emotion Chuck Norris can smell. He can also detect hope, as in "I hope I don't get a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris"

#288

Chuck Norris once went skydiving, but promised never to do it again. One Grand Canyon is enough.

#306

How many roundhouse kicks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Just one. From Chuck Norris.