182,000 Americans die from Chuck Norris-related accidents every year. 289 306 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 49% approval (595 votes)
CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.
The pie scene in "American Pie" is based on a dare Chuck Norris took when he was younger. However, in Chuck Norris' case, the "pie" was the molten crater of an active volcano.
Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle - you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.
Chuck Norris does not have to answer the phone. His beard picks up the incoming electrical impulses and translates them into audible sound.