Ninjas want to grow up to be just like Chuck Norris. But usually they grow up just to be killed by Chuck Norris.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#458

The pen is mightier than the sword, but only if the pen is held by Chuck Norris.

#331

Chuck Norris can skeletize a cow in two minutes.

#79

Chuck Norris sheds his skin twice a year.

#509

Chuck Norris' beard can type 140 wpm.

#722

Chuck Norris once won the Kentucky Derby, on foot.

#507

Chuck Norris doesn't do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts.

#84

Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.

#702

Chuck Norris finished the neverending story.

#495

Chuck Norris' first program was kill -9.

#602

Chuck Norris can make a class that is both abstract and final.

#9

Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this a slow Tuesday.

#401

Chuck Norris is the only person who can simultaneously hold and fire FIVE Uzis: One in each hand, one in each foot -- and the 5th one he roundhouse-kicks into the air, so that it sprays bullets.