Ninjas want to grow up to be just like Chuck Norris. But usually they grow up just to be killed by Chuck Norris.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#402

For undercover police work, Chuck Norris pins his badge underneath his shirt, directly into his chest.

#652

When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris.

#235

Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.

#473

A man once taunted Chuck Norris with a bag of Lay's potato chips, saying "Betcha can't eat just one!" Chuck Norris proceeded to eat the chips, the bag, and the man in one deft move.

#306

How many roundhouse kicks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Just one. From Chuck Norris.

#642

Chuck Norris can hear the speed of light.

#227

'Icy-Hot' is too weak for Chuck Norris. After a workout, Chuck Norris rubs his muscles down with liquid-hot MAGMA.

#75

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

#280

One day Chuck Norris walked down the street with a massive erection. There were no survivors.

#20

Wo hu cang long. The translation from Mandarin Chinese reads: "Crouching Chuck, Hidden Norris"

#488

Everything King Midas touches turnes to gold. Everything Chuck Norris touches turns up dead.

#475

In the first Jurassic Park movie, the Tyrannosaurus Rex wasn't chasing the jeep. Chuck Norris was chasing the Tyrannosaurus AND the jeep.