Chuck Norris' first program was kill -9. 293 337 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 47% approval (630 votes)
In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.
It is said that looking into Chuck Norris' eyes will reveal your future. Unfortunately, everybody's future is always the same: death by a roundhouse-kick to the face.
Chuck Norris' version of a "chocolate milkshake" is a raw porterhouse wrapped around ten Hershey bars, and doused in diesel fuel.
Chuck Norris' testicles do not produce sperm. They produce tiny white ninjas that recognize only one mission: seek and destroy.