Chuck Norris already went to Moon and Mars, that's why there are no signs of life.

289 330

More Chuck Norris facts

#187

A high tide means Chuck Norris is flying over your coast. The tide is caused by God pissing his pants.

#120

Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.

#86

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.

#531

Chuck Norris doesn't use reflection, reflection asks politely for his help.

#354

Scientifically speaking, it is impossible to charge Chuck Norris with obstruction of justice. This is because even Chuck Norris cannot be in two places at the same time.

#350

Chuck Norris doesn't go on the internet, he has every internet site stored in his memory. He refreshes webpages by blinking.

#201

If, by some incredible space-time paradox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win. Period.

#650

Chuck Norris makes onions cry.

#449

There is no such thing as a lesbian, just a woman who has never met Chuck Norris.

#286

Sticks and stones may break your bones, but a Chuck Norris glare will liquefy your kidneys.

#167

Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.

#259

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.