Chuck Norris already went to Moon and Mars, that's why there are no signs of life.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#251

Chuck Norris began selling the Total Gym as an ill-fated attempt to make his day-to-day opponents less laughably pathetic.

#586

Chuck Norris killed two stones with one bird.

#25

When Chuck Norris says "More cowbell", he MEANS it.

#525

Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.

#405

The word 'Kill' was invented by Chuck Norris. Other words were 'Die', 'Beer', and 'What'.

#551

Every SQL statement that Chuck Norris codes has an implicit "COMMIT" in its end.

#186

Chuck Norris invented the bolt-action rifle, liquor, sexual intercourse, and football-- in that order.

#189

There is in fact an 'I' in Norris, but there is no 'team'. Not even close.

#588

Chuck Norris can over-write a locked variable.

#531

Chuck Norris doesn't use reflection, reflection asks politely for his help.

#480

In ancient China there is a legend that one day a child will be born from a dragon, grow to be a man, and vanquish evil from the land. That man is not Chuck Norris, because Chuck Norris killed that man.

#347

Jack Bauer tried to use his detailed knowledge of torture techniques, but to no avail: Chuck Norris thrives on pain. Chuck Norris then ripped off Jack Bauer's arm and beat him to death with it. Game, set, match.