Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum. 304 276 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 52% approval (580 votes)
They say curiosity killed the cat. This is false. Chuck Norris killed the cat. Every single one of them.
In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.
Every time someone uses the word "intense", Chuck Norris always replies "you know what else is intense?" followed by a roundhouse kick to the face.
In ancient China there is a legend that one day a child will be born from a dragon, grow to be a man, and vanquish evil from the land. That man is not Chuck Norris, because Chuck Norris killed that man.
In the Beginning there was nothing … then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked nothing and told it to get a job.
Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.