Chuck Norris sits at the stand-up. 286 327 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 47% approval (613 votes)
The phrase 'dead ringer' refers to someone who sits behind Chuck Norris in a movie theater and forgets to turn their cell phone off.
In ancient China there is a legend that one day a child will be born from a dragon, grow to be a man, and vanquish evil from the land. That man is not Chuck Norris, because Chuck Norris killed that man.
Chuck Norris doesnt shave, he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.
Saddam Hussein was not found hiding in a hole. Saddam was roundhouse-kicked in the head by Chuck Norris in Kansas, which sent him through the earth, stopping just short of the surface of Iraq.
Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent.