Chuck Norris sits at the stand-up.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#305

Chuck Norris does not have to answer the phone. His beard picks up the incoming electrical impulses and translates them into audible sound.

#563

Chuck Norris can retrieve anything from /dev/null.

#158

In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job". That is the story of the universe.

#45

Chuck Norris' keyboard doesn't have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris.

#596

Chuck Norris' unit tests don't run. They die.

#77

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.

#583

Chuck Norris does infinite loops in 4 seconds.

#392

Aliens DO indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Chuck Norris is on.

#454

Chuck Norris originally wrote the first dictionary. The definition for each word is as follows - A swift roundhouse kick to the face.

#199

Hellen Keller's favorite color is Chuck Norris.

#640

Jaws stays on the beach when Chuck Norris swims.

#328

Chuck Norris does, in fact, live in a round house.