Chuck Norris sits at the stand-up.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#725

Chuck Norris can read and write emails from a typewriter.

#126

There are no races, only countries of people Chuck Norris has beaten to different shades of black and blue.

#339

Chuck Norris never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself out of fear.

#217

Ninjas want to grow up to be just like Chuck Norris. But usually they grow up just to be killed by Chuck Norris.

#514

Chuck Norris can overflow your stack just by looking at it.

#361

All roads lead to Chuck Norris. And by the transitive property, a roundhouse kick to the face.

#206

Superman once watched an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger. He then cried himself to sleep.

#565

No one has ever spoken during review of Chuck Norris' code and lived to tell about it.

#324

One time, Chuck Norris accidentally stubbed his toe. It destroyed the entire state of Ohio.

#302

Saddam Hussein was not found hiding in a hole. Saddam was roundhouse-kicked in the head by Chuck Norris in Kansas, which sent him through the earth, stopping just short of the surface of Iraq.

#241

Chuck Norris' show is called Walker: Texas Ranger, because Chuck Norris doesn't run.

#449

There is no such thing as a lesbian, just a woman who has never met Chuck Norris.