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Chuck Norris sits at the stand-up.
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#232
In an act of great philanthropy, Chuck made a generous donation to the American Cancer Society. He donated 6,000 dead bodies for scientific research.
#429
Chuck Norris once participated in the running of the bulls. He walked.
#263
Chuck Norris can judge a book by its cover.
#603
Chuck Norris could use anything in java.util.* to kill you, including the javadocs.
#589
Chuck Norris knows the value of NULL, and he can sort by it too.
#186
Chuck Norris invented the bolt-action rifle, liquor, sexual intercourse, and football-- in that order.
#90
In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.
#131
Scientists have estimated that the energy given off during the Big Bang is roughly equal to 1CNRhK (Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick).
#38
The pie scene in "American Pie" is based on a dare Chuck Norris took when he was younger. However, in Chuck Norris' case, the "pie" was the molten crater of an active volcano.
#304
Chuck Norris doesn't look both ways before he crosses the street... he just roundhouses any cars that get too close.
#102
Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off. It was called Walker: Texas Chain Saw Masacre.
#235
Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.
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