If you work in an office with Chuck Norris, don't ask him for his three-hole-punch. 289 346 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 46% approval (635 votes)
When you play Monopoly with Chuck Norris, you do not pass go, and you do not collect two hundred dollars. You will be lucky if you make it out alive.
For undercover police work, Chuck Norris pins his badge underneath his shirt, directly into his chest.
In honor of Chuck Norris, all McDonald's in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be Chucksized.
'Icy-Hot' is too weak for Chuck Norris. After a workout, Chuck Norris rubs his muscles down with liquid-hot MAGMA.
Human cloning is outlawed because of Chuck Norris, because then it would be possible for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to meet another Chuck Norris roundhouse kick. Physicists theorize that this contact would end the universe.
The only sure things are Death and Taxes and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.