If you work in an office with Chuck Norris, don't ask him for his three-hole-punch. 289 346 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 46% approval (635 votes)
The only sure things are Death and Taxes and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.
For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.
When you play Monopoly with Chuck Norris, you do not pass go, and you do not collect two hundred dollars. You will be lucky if you make it out alive.
CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.
In honor of Chuck Norris, all McDonald's in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size. When ordering, just ask to be Chucksized.
Chuck Norris once worked as a weatherman for the San Diego evening news. Every night he would make the same forecast: Partly cloudy with a 75% chance of Pain.