If you work in an office with Chuck Norris, don't ask him for his three-hole-punch.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#382

Chuck Norris qualified with a top speed of 324 mph at the Daytona 500, without a car.

#691

Chuck Norris is Simon Cowell's judge.

#340

If you were somehow able to land a punch on Chuck Norris your entire arm would shatter upon impact. This is only in theory, since, come on, who in their right mind would try this?

#348

Chuck Norris eats steak for every single meal. Most times he forgets to kill the cow.

#504

Chuck Norris doesn't use web standards as the web will conform to him.

#241

Chuck Norris' show is called Walker: Texas Ranger, because Chuck Norris doesn't run.

#652

When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls from Chuck Norris.

#82

When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

#94

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.

#514

Chuck Norris can overflow your stack just by looking at it.

#674

Chuck Norris did it his way and Sinatra sang about it.

#31

Chuck Norris' sperm is so badass, he had sex with Nicole Kidman, and 7 months later she prematurely gave birth to a Ford Excursion.