Chuck Norris never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself out of fear.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#694

When Chuck Norris lifts weights, the dumbells get tired.

#609

Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.

#210

Chuck Norris does not style his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror.

#384

Chuck Norris uses tabasco sauce instead of visine.

#499

Chuck Norris can write infinite recursion functions and have them return.

#469

Mr. T pities the fool. Chuck Norris rips the fool's head off.

#110

Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.

#594

Chuck Norris can read from an input stream.

#271

Chuck Norris does not own a house. He walks into random houses and people move.

#687

Chuck Norris can break water in half.

#264

Nothing can escape the gravity of a black hole, except for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris eats black holes. They taste like chicken.

#73

There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.