70% of a human's weight is water. 70% of Chuck Norris' weight is his dick.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#167

Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.

#125

Some people like to eat frogs' legs. Chuck Norris likes to eat lizard legs. Hence, snakes.

#467

The 1972 Miami Dolphins lost one game, it was a game vs. Chuck Norris and three seven year old girls. Chuck Norris won with a roundhouse-kick to the face in overtime.

#63

In the Beginning there was nothing … then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked nothing and told it to get a job.

#362

July 4th is Independence day. And the day Chuck Norris was born. Coincidence? I think not.

#607

Chuck Norris already went to Moon and Mars, that's why there are no signs of life.

#157

Chuck Norris doesn't throw up if he drinks too much. Chuck Norris throws down!

#484

Chuck Norris likes his ice like he likes his skulls: crushed.

#541

Chuck Norris' programs never exit, they terminate.

#639

Chuck Norris can lock a safe and keep the key inside it.

#251

Chuck Norris began selling the Total Gym as an ill-fated attempt to make his day-to-day opponents less laughably pathetic.

#347

Jack Bauer tried to use his detailed knowledge of torture techniques, but to no avail: Chuck Norris thrives on pain. Chuck Norris then ripped off Jack Bauer's arm and beat him to death with it. Game, set, match.