70% of a human's weight is water. 70% of Chuck Norris' weight is his dick.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#473

A man once taunted Chuck Norris with a bag of Lay's potato chips, saying "Betcha can't eat just one!" Chuck Norris proceeded to eat the chips, the bag, and the man in one deft move.

#428

Diamonds are not, despite popular belief, carbon. They are, in fact, Chuck Norris fecal matter. This was proven a recently, when scientific analysis revealed what appeared to be Jean-Claude Van Damme bone fragments inside the Hope Diamond.

#73

There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.

#355

Chuck Norris never has to wax his skis because they're always slick with blood.

#710

When Chuck Norris works out he doesn't get stronger, the machine does.

#552

Chuck Norris does not need to type-cast. The Chuck-Norris Compiler (CNC) sees through things. All way down. Always.

#443

Only Chuck Norris can prevent forest fires.

#458

The pen is mightier than the sword, but only if the pen is held by Chuck Norris.

#331

Chuck Norris can skeletize a cow in two minutes.

#560

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.

#517

Chuck Norris doesn't need a debugger, he just stares down the bug until the code confesses.

#263

Chuck Norris can judge a book by its cover.