70% of a human's weight is water. 70% of Chuck Norris' weight is his dick.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#654

Chuck Norris can dry his hair under water.

#265

Chuck Norris does not play the lottery. It doesn't have nearly enough balls.

#572

Chuck Norris is the ultimate mutex, all threads fear him.

#601

Chuck Norris can download emails with his pick-up.

#133

When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it won't be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.

#63

In the Beginning there was nothing … then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked nothing and told it to get a job.

#229

When Chuck Norris was a baby, he didn't suck his mother's breast. His mother served him whiskey, straight out of the bottle.

#649

Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.

#487

Chuck Norris did not "lose" his virginity, he stalked it and then destroyed it with extreme prejudice.

#455

Love does not hurt. Chuck Norris does.

#275

Chuck Norris smells what the Rock is cooking... because the Rock is Chuck Norris' personal chef.

#158

In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job". That is the story of the universe.