If Chuck Norris wants your opinion, he'll beat it into you.

340 371

More Chuck Norris facts

#174

When Chuck Norris is in a crowded area, he doesn't walk around people. He walks through them.

#275

Chuck Norris smells what the Rock is cooking... because the Rock is Chuck Norris' personal chef.

#642

Chuck Norris can hear the speed of light.

#716

Before he forgot a gift for Chuck Norris, Santa Claus was real.

#411

When Chuck Norris goes to out to eat, he orders a whole chicken, but he only eats its soul.

#590

China lets Chuck Norris search for porn on Google.

#452

One time, at band camp, Chuck Norris ate a percussionist.

#311

Never look a gift Chuck Norris in the mouth, because he will bite your damn eyes off.

#445

Chuck Norris is not Irish. His hair is soaked in the blood of his victims.

#106

Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.

#133

When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it won't be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.

#306

How many roundhouse kicks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Just one. From Chuck Norris.