How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? All of it.

335 277

More Chuck Norris facts

#42

Chuck Norris has never been accused of murder because his roundhouse kicks are recognized as "acts of God".

#61

Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.

#418

They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but there was a problem-- It wouldn't take shit from anybody.

#422

After taking a steroids test doctors informed Chuck Norris that he had tested positive. He laughed upon receiving this information, and said "of course my urine tested positive, what do you think they make steroids from?"

#161

Archaeologists unearthed an old english dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined victim as "one who has encountered Chuck Norris"

#519

Chuck Norris can instantiate an abstract class.

#214

Chuck Norris did in fact, build Rome in a day.

#501

The only pattern Chuck Norris knows is God Object.

#441

Let the Bodies Hit the Floor was originally written as Chuck Norris' theme song.

#239

If Chuck Norris were a calendar, every month would be named Chucktober, and every day he'd kick your ass.

#620

Chuck Norris can make fire using two ice cubes.

#488

Everything King Midas touches turnes to gold. Everything Chuck Norris touches turns up dead.