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Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.
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#123
When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn't get charged. He holds up the phone and money falls out.
#381
Chuck Norris was banned from competitive bullriding after a 1992 exhibition in San Antonio, when he rode the bull 1,346 miles from Texas to Milwaukee Wisconsin to pick up his dry cleaning.
#404
We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.
#564
No one has ever pair-programmed with Chuck Norris and lived to tell about it.
#280
One day Chuck Norris walked down the street with a massive erection. There were no survivors.
#730
The reason Superman flies is because he knows Chuck Norris is on the ground.
#73
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
#82
When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.
#505
It works on my machine always holds true for Chuck Norris.
#547
Chuck Norris can install iTunes without installing Quicktime.
#419
Chuck Norris once rode a nine foot grizzly bear through an automatic car wash, instead of taking a shower.
#88
Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he only takes blood baths.
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