Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes. He accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#350

Chuck Norris doesn't go on the internet, he has every internet site stored in his memory. He refreshes webpages by blinking.

#541

Chuck Norris' programs never exit, they terminate.

#579

Chuck Norris types with one finger. He points it at the keyboard and the keyboard does the rest.

#542

Chuck Norris insists on strongly-typed programming languages.

#195

Chuck Norris does not own a stove, oven, or microwave , because revenge is a dish best served cold.

#70

Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light

#198

The original draft of The Lord of the Rings featured Chuck Norris instead of Frodo Baggins. It was only 5 pages long, as Chuck roundhouse-kicked Sauron's ass halfway through the first chapter.

#323

Chuck Norris does not kick ass and take names. In fact, Chuck Norris kicks ass and assigns the corpse a number. It is currently recorded to be in the billions.

#193

Using his trademark roundhouse kick, Chuck Norris once made a fieldgoal in RJ Stadium in Tampa Bay from the 50 yard line of Qualcomm stadium in San Diego.

#73

There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.

#543

Chuck Norris protocol design method has no status, requests or responses, only commands.

#428

Diamonds are not, despite popular belief, carbon. They are, in fact, Chuck Norris fecal matter. This was proven a recently, when scientific analysis revealed what appeared to be Jean-Claude Van Damme bone fragments inside the Hope Diamond.