Once death had a near Chuck Norris experience. 260 345 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 43% approval (605 votes)
Jack Bauer tried to use his detailed knowledge of torture techniques, but to no avail: Chuck Norris thrives on pain. Chuck Norris then ripped off Jack Bauer's arm and beat him to death with it. Game, set, match.
When J. Robert Oppenheimer said "I am become death, the destroyer Of worlds", He was not referring to the atomic bomb. He was referring to the Chuck Norris halloween costume he was wearing.
The only sure things are Death and Taxes and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.
You know how they say if you die in your dream then you will die in real life? In actuality, if you dream of death then Chuck Norris will find you and kill you.
A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart disease, 2. Chuck Norris, 3. Cancer
Archaeologists unearthed an old english dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined victim as "one who has encountered Chuck Norris"
4 out of 5 doctors fail to recommend Chuck Norris as a solution to most problems. Also, 80% of doctors die unexplained, needlessly brutal deaths.