Once death had a near Chuck Norris experience.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#600

Chuck Norris causes the Windows Blue Screen of Death.

#199

Hellen Keller's favorite color is Chuck Norris.

#61

Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.

#660

Chuck Norris can grill a popsicle.

#319

The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry. Even the worst-laid plans of Chuck Norris come off without a hitch.

#123

When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn't get charged. He holds up the phone and money falls out.

#110

Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.

#338

There are two types of people in the world... people that suck, and Chuck Norris.

#299

Maslow's theory of higher needs does not apply to Chuck Norris. He only has two needs: killing people and finding people to kill.

#665

Chuck Norris doesn't drive, he tells the car where to go.

#612

There is no April 1st in Chuck Norris' calendar, because no one can fool him.

#493

Chuck Norris can't test for equality because he has no equal.