Chuck Norris never has to wax his skis because they're always slick with blood.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#602

Chuck Norris can make a class that is both abstract and final.

#597

Chuck Norris sits at the stand-up.

#48

Chuck Norris' OSI network model has only one layer - Physical.

#448

They say curiosity killed the cat. This is false. Chuck Norris killed the cat. Every single one of them.

#228

Chuck Norris cannot love, he can only not kill.

#304

Chuck Norris doesn't look both ways before he crosses the street... he just roundhouses any cars that get too close.

#82

When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

#124

Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.

#772

Condoms wear Chuck Norris for protection.

#300

The truth will set you free. Unless Chuck Norris has you, in which case, forget it buddy!

#668

Chuck Norris once thought he was wrong. He was, however, mistaken.

#108

Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.