Chuck Norris has a deep and abiding respect for human life... unless it gets in his way.

322 350

More Chuck Norris facts

#143

While urinating, Chuck Norris is easily capable of welding titanium.

#505

It works on my machine always holds true for Chuck Norris.

#320

The phrase 'dead ringer' refers to someone who sits behind Chuck Norris in a movie theater and forgets to turn their cell phone off.

#656

Chuck Norris can go past the Character limit.

#243

Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Chuck Norris.

#608

Once a police officer caught Chuck Norris, the cop was lucky enough to escape with a warning.

#114

Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe with eleven herbs and spices. Nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.

#544

Chuck Norris programs occupy 150% of CPU, even when they are not executing.

#258

It is scientifically impossible for Chuck Norris to have had a mortal father. The most popular theory is that he went back in time and fathered himself.

#602

Chuck Norris can make a class that is both abstract and final.

#260

It is believed dinosaurs are extinct due to a giant meteor. That's true if you want to call Chuck Norris a giant meteor.

#251

Chuck Norris began selling the Total Gym as an ill-fated attempt to make his day-to-day opponents less laughably pathetic.