Chuck Norris describes human beings as "a sociable holder for blood and guts". 269 265 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 50% approval (534 votes)
Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle - you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.
Human cloning is outlawed because of Chuck Norris, because then it would be possible for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to meet another Chuck Norris roundhouse kick. Physicists theorize that this contact would end the universe.
There is endless debate about the existence of the human soul. Well it does exist and Chuck Norris finds it delicious.
Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.
Chuck Norris was banned from competitive bullriding after a 1992 exhibition in San Antonio, when he rode the bull 1,346 miles from Texas to Milwaukee Wisconsin to pick up his dry cleaning.