Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through land.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#593

Chuck Norris can write to an output stream.

#308

The phrase 'break a leg' was originally coined by Chuck Norris' co-stars in Walker, Texas Ranger as a good luck charm, indicating that a broken leg might be the worst extent of their injuries. This never proved to be the case.

#280

One day Chuck Norris walked down the street with a massive erection. There were no survivors.

#149

For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.

#608

Once a police officer caught Chuck Norris, the cop was lucky enough to escape with a warning.

#694

When Chuck Norris lifts weights, the dumbells get tired.

#615

Chuck Norris built the hospital he was born in.

#312

Chuck Norris used to play baseball. When Babe Ruth was hailed as the better player, Chuck Norris killed him with a baseball bat to the throat. Lou Gehrig got off easy.

#468

Chuck Norris is not Politically Correct. He is just Correct. Always.

#80

Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.

#682

Chuck Norris voids warranties.

#219

The last thing you hear before Chuck Norris gives you a roundhouse kick? No one knows because dead men tell no tales.