Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through land.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#96

Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill.

#506

Whiteboards are white because Chuck Norris scared them that way.

#54

Chuck Norris' programs can pass the Turing Test by staring at the interrogator.

#499

Chuck Norris can write infinite recursion functions and have them return.

#714

When Chuck Norris enters into a courtroom, the judge stands up.

#170

You know how they say if you die in your dream then you will die in real life? In actuality, if you dream of death then Chuck Norris will find you and kill you.

#586

Chuck Norris killed two stones with one bird.

#326

Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with beef jerky.

#194

Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.

#772

Condoms wear Chuck Norris for protection.

#210

Chuck Norris does not style his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror.

#700

Guns are warned not to play with Chuck Norris.