One day Chuck Norris walked down the street with a massive erection. There were no survivors.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#377

There are only two things that can cut diamonds: other diamonds, and Chuck Norris.

#185

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.

#734

When Chuck Norris turned 18, his parents moved out.

#683

Miss Daisy drove Chuck Norris.

#442

Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

#638

Chuck Norris puts sunglasses on to protect the sun from his eyes.

#607

Chuck Norris already went to Moon and Mars, that's why there are no signs of life.

#297

Chuck Norris can win at solitaire with only 18 cards.

#161

Archaeologists unearthed an old english dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined victim as "one who has encountered Chuck Norris"

#722

Chuck Norris once won the Kentucky Derby, on foot.

#678

The Dead Sea was once alive before Chuck Norris bathed there.

#105

Chuck Norris doesn't wash his clothes. He disembowels them.