Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#190

Scotty in Star Trek often says "Ye cannae change the laws of physics. This is untrue. Chuck Norris can change the laws of physics. With his fists.

#423

Chuck Norris doesn't daydream. He's too busy giving other people nightmares.

#266

How many Chuck Norris' does it take to change a light bulb? None, Chuck Norris prefers to kill in the dark.

#555

Chuck Norris compresses his files by doing a flying round house kick to the hard drive.

#67

The dinosaurs looked at Chuck Norris the wrong way once. You know what happened to them.

#657

Chuck Norris was the reason E.T. went home.

#56

Chuck Norris' brain waves are suspected to be harmful to cell phones.

#258

It is scientifically impossible for Chuck Norris to have had a mortal father. The most popular theory is that he went back in time and fathered himself.

#594

Chuck Norris can read from an input stream.

#65

Chuck Norris has a mug of nails instead of coffee in the morning.

#10

When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer. You will score over 8000.

#428

Diamonds are not, despite popular belief, carbon. They are, in fact, Chuck Norris fecal matter. This was proven a recently, when scientific analysis revealed what appeared to be Jean-Claude Van Damme bone fragments inside the Hope Diamond.