If Chuck Norris were a vegetable he'd be a Chuck Norris.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#20

Wo hu cang long. The translation from Mandarin Chinese reads: "Crouching Chuck, Hidden Norris"

#653

Chuck Norris can win a staring contest while blinking.

#604

Code runs faster when Chuck Norris watches it.

#183

Chuck Norris once worked as a weatherman for the San Diego evening news. Every night he would make the same forecast: Partly cloudy with a 75% chance of Pain.

#369

Chuck Norris is widely predicted to be first black president. If you're thinking to yourself, "But Chuck Norris isn't black", then you are dead wrong. And stop being a racist.

#280

One day Chuck Norris walked down the street with a massive erection. There were no survivors.

#17

The movie "Delta Force" was extremely hard to make because Chuck had to downplay his abilities. The first few cuts were completely unbelievable.

#272

It is better to give than to receive. This is especially true of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.

#452

One time, at band camp, Chuck Norris ate a percussionist.

#96

Chuck Norris has two speeds: Walk and Kill.

#447

Chuck Norris' dick is so big, it has it's own dick, and that dick is still bigger than yours.

#166

Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his mother's womb.