If Chuck Norris were a vegetable he'd be a Chuck Norris.

280 276

More Chuck Norris facts

#672

Chuck Norris can laugh with a straight face.

#470

Chuck Norris had to stop washing his clothes in the ocean. The tsunamis were killing people.

#499

Chuck Norris can write infinite recursion functions and have them return.

#571

The Chuck Norris Eclipse plugin made alien contact.

#198

The original draft of The Lord of the Rings featured Chuck Norris instead of Frodo Baggins. It was only 5 pages long, as Chuck roundhouse-kicked Sauron's ass halfway through the first chapter.

#473

A man once taunted Chuck Norris with a bag of Lay's potato chips, saying "Betcha can't eat just one!" Chuck Norris proceeded to eat the chips, the bag, and the man in one deft move.

#600

Chuck Norris causes the Windows Blue Screen of Death.

#304

Chuck Norris doesn't look both ways before he crosses the street... he just roundhouses any cars that get too close.

#166

Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his mother's womb.

#315

The phrase 'balls to the wall' was originally conceived to describe Chuck Norris entering any building smaller than an aircraft hangar.

#342

Jean-Claude Van Damme once kicked Chuck Norris' ass. He was then awakened from his dream by a roundhouse kick to the face.

#7

CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.