If Chuck Norris were a vegetable he'd be a Chuck Norris.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#273

Chuck Norris is the only person to ever win a staring contest against Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder.

#162

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

#402

For undercover police work, Chuck Norris pins his badge underneath his shirt, directly into his chest.

#227

'Icy-Hot' is too weak for Chuck Norris. After a workout, Chuck Norris rubs his muscles down with liquid-hot MAGMA.

#323

Chuck Norris does not kick ass and take names. In fact, Chuck Norris kicks ass and assigns the corpse a number. It is currently recorded to be in the billions.

#175

Chuck Norris once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.

#592

Chuck Norris doesn't have pubic hairs because hair doesn't grow on balls of steel.

#309

When Chuck Norris does division, there are no remainders.

#354

Scientifically speaking, it is impossible to charge Chuck Norris with obstruction of justice. This is because even Chuck Norris cannot be in two places at the same time.

#215

Along with his black belt, Chuck Norris often chooses to wear brown shoes. No one has DARED call him on it. Ever.

#428

Diamonds are not, despite popular belief, carbon. They are, in fact, Chuck Norris fecal matter. This was proven a recently, when scientific analysis revealed what appeared to be Jean-Claude Van Damme bone fragments inside the Hope Diamond.

#587

Chuck Norris can speak Braille.