Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#84

Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.

#392

Aliens DO indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Chuck Norris is on.

#389

Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.

#103

Chuck Norris will attain statehood in 2009. His state flower will be the Magnolia.

#451

When Chuck Norris was born, he immediately had sex with the first nurse he saw. He was her first. She was his third. That afternoon.

#480

In ancient China there is a legend that one day a child will be born from a dragon, grow to be a man, and vanquish evil from the land. That man is not Chuck Norris, because Chuck Norris killed that man.

#321

Staring at Chuck Norris for extended periods of time without proper eye protection will cause blindess, and possibly foot sized brusies on the face.

#702

Chuck Norris finished the neverending story.

#593

Chuck Norris can write to an output stream.

#633

Chuck Norris doesn't win, he allows you to lose.

#674

Chuck Norris did it his way and Sinatra sang about it.

#219

The last thing you hear before Chuck Norris gives you a roundhouse kick? No one knows because dead men tell no tales.