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Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.
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#257
Nagasaki never had a bomb dropped on it. Chuck Norris jumped out of a plane and punched the ground
#665
Chuck Norris doesn't drive, he tells the car where to go.
#212
A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart disease, 2. Chuck Norris, 3. Cancer
#90
In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.
#646
Chuck Norris can hear sign language.
#746
Chuck Norris remembers the future.
#418
They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but there was a problem-- It wouldn't take shit from anybody.
#619
Once Chuck Norris and Superman had a competition. The loser had to wear his underwear over his pants.
#139
The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
#658
Chuck Norris can eat one pringle.
#468
Chuck Norris is not Politically Correct. He is just Correct. Always.
#618
Once death had a near Chuck Norris experience.
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