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Roundhouse your way through
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Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats. Chuck Norris bites the heads off of Siberian Tigers.
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#352
It is said that looking into Chuck Norris' eyes will reveal your future. Unfortunately, everybody's future is always the same: death by a roundhouse-kick to the face.
#608
Once a police officer caught Chuck Norris, the cop was lucky enough to escape with a warning.
#175
Chuck Norris once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.
#491
Chuck Norris doesn't have disk latency because the hard drive knows to hurry the hell up.
#102
Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off. It was called Walker: Texas Chain Saw Masacre.
#736
When Chuck Norris stares into the abyss, the abyss nervously looks away.
#8
Chuck Norris can't finish a "color by numbers" because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.
#94
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
#634
Tornados occur when Chuck Norris sneezes.
#335
The square root of Chuck Norris is pain. Do not try to square Chuck Norris, the result is death.
#332
The only sure things are Death and Taxes and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.
#282
Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.
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