Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#629

Chuck Norris can stand on his head. His dick-head.

#29

Chuck Norris kills anyone that asks: "Do you want fries with that?". Because by now everyone should know that Chuck doesn't want fries with anything. Ever.

#681

Chuck Norris CAN talk about fight club.

#672

Chuck Norris can laugh with a straight face.

#692

Chuck Norris Let The Dogs Out.

#127

When Chuck Norris was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendy's.

#566

Chuck Norris doesn't use GUI, he prefers COMMAND line.

#187

A high tide means Chuck Norris is flying over your coast. The tide is caused by God pissing his pants.

#180

It takes 14 puppeteers to make Chuck Norris smile, but only 2 to make him destroy an orphanage.

#243

Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Chuck Norris.

#630

There was never anything wrong with Achilles' heel until he got mad and decided to kick Chuck Norris.

#114

Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe with eleven herbs and spices. Nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.