Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#390

Chuck Norris owns a chain of fast-food restaurants throughout the southwest. They serve nothing but barbecue-flavored ice cream and Hot Pockets.

#589

Chuck Norris knows the value of NULL, and he can sort by it too.

#317

Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats. Chuck Norris bites the heads off of Siberian Tigers.

#299

Maslow's theory of higher needs does not apply to Chuck Norris. He only has two needs: killing people and finding people to kill.

#86

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.

#715

Freddy Krueger has nightmares about Chuck Norris.

#667

The French talk to Chuck Norris in English.

#65

Chuck Norris has a mug of nails instead of coffee in the morning.

#699

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

#339

Chuck Norris never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself out of fear.

#404

We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.

#507

Chuck Norris doesn't do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts.