Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off. It was called Walker: Texas Chain Saw Masacre. 279 307 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 48% approval (586 votes)
If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" you will generate zero results. It just doesn't happen.
The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked one of the corners off.
Chuck Norris once pissed in a gas tank of a semi truck as a joke - that truck is now know as Optimus Prime.
Every time someone uses the word "intense", Chuck Norris always replies "you know what else is intense?" followed by a roundhouse kick to the face.
Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.
Every time Chuck Norris smiles, someone dies. Unless he smiles while he's roundhouse kicking someone in the face. Then two people die.
The phrase 'dead ringer' refers to someone who sits behind Chuck Norris in a movie theater and forgets to turn their cell phone off.
That's not Chuck Norris doing push-ups -- that's Chuck Norris moving the Earth away from the path of a deadly asteroid.