When Chuck Norris talks, everybody listens. And dies.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#154

Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.

#30

Chuck Norris' version of a "chocolate milkshake" is a raw porterhouse wrapped around ten Hershey bars, and doused in diesel fuel.

#13

If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" you will generate zero results. It just doesn't happen.

#420

Sweating bullets is literally what happens when Chuck Norris gets too hot.

#711

What is the last thing that goes through the head of any Chuck Norris victim? His foot.

#206

Superman once watched an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger. He then cried himself to sleep.

#591

Chuck Norris can install a 64 bit OS on 32 bit machines.

#478

Rules of fighting: 1) Don't bring a knife to a gun fight. 2) Don't bring a gun to a Chuck Norris fight.

#373

Every time someone uses the word "intense", Chuck Norris always replies "you know what else is intense?" followed by a roundhouse kick to the face.

#552

Chuck Norris does not need to type-cast. The Chuck-Norris Compiler (CNC) sees through things. All way down. Always.

#271

Chuck Norris does not own a house. He walks into random houses and people move.

#105

Chuck Norris doesn't wash his clothes. He disembowels them.