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Roundhouse your way through
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For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.
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#711
What is the last thing that goes through the head of any Chuck Norris victim? His foot.
#401
Chuck Norris is the only person who can simultaneously hold and fire FIVE Uzis: One in each hand, one in each foot -- and the 5th one he roundhouse-kicks into the air, so that it sprays bullets.
#525
Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.
#8
Chuck Norris can't finish a "color by numbers" because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.
#461
The air around Chuck Norris is always a balmy 78 degrees.
#85
According to the Encyclopedia Brittanica, the Native American "Trail of Tears" has been redefined as anywhere that Chuck Norris walks.
#395
Some people ask for a Kleenex when they sneeze, Chuck Norris asks for a body bag.
#648
Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.
#699
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
#524
Chuck Norris is actually the front man for Apple. He let's Steve Jobs run the show when he's on a mission. Chuck Norris is always on a mission.
#638
Chuck Norris puts sunglasses on to protect the sun from his eyes.
#24
The Bible was originally titled "Chuck Norris and Friends"
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