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Roundhouse your way through
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Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are known today as Giraffes.
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#451
When Chuck Norris was born, he immediately had sex with the first nurse he saw. He was her first. She was his third. That afternoon.
#192
Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes. He accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.
#272
It is better to give than to receive. This is especially true of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
#524
Chuck Norris is actually the front man for Apple. He let's Steve Jobs run the show when he's on a mission. Chuck Norris is always on a mission.
#183
Chuck Norris once worked as a weatherman for the San Diego evening news. Every night he would make the same forecast: Partly cloudy with a 75% chance of Pain.
#317
Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats. Chuck Norris bites the heads off of Siberian Tigers.
#238
If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.
#9
Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this a slow Tuesday.
#581
If you try to kill -9 Chuck Norris' programs, it backfires.
#330
4 out of 5 doctors fail to recommend Chuck Norris as a solution to most problems. Also, 80% of doctors die unexplained, needlessly brutal deaths.
#246
There is endless debate about the existence of the human soul. Well it does exist and Chuck Norris finds it delicious.
#478
Rules of fighting: 1) Don't bring a knife to a gun fight. 2) Don't bring a gun to a Chuck Norris fight.
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