Nothing can escape the gravity of a black hole, except for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris eats black holes. They taste like chicken.

306 256

More Chuck Norris facts

#388

A man once claimed Chuck Norris kicked his ass twice, but it was promptly dismissed as false - no one could survive it the first time.

#45

Chuck Norris' keyboard doesn't have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris.

#355

Chuck Norris never has to wax his skis because they're always slick with blood.

#29

Chuck Norris kills anyone that asks: "Do you want fries with that?". Because by now everyone should know that Chuck doesn't want fries with anything. Ever.

#99

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool Chuck Norris once and he will roundhouse kick you in the face.

#180

It takes 14 puppeteers to make Chuck Norris smile, but only 2 to make him destroy an orphanage.

#591

Chuck Norris can install a 64 bit OS on 32 bit machines.

#186

Chuck Norris invented the bolt-action rifle, liquor, sexual intercourse, and football-- in that order.

#275

Chuck Norris smells what the Rock is cooking... because the Rock is Chuck Norris' personal chef.

#262

That's not Chuck Norris doing push-ups -- that's Chuck Norris moving the Earth away from the path of a deadly asteroid.

#314

Guantuanamo Bay, Cuba, is the military code-word for "Chuck Norris' basement"

#270

Chuck Norris invented the internet, just so he had a place to store his porn.