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Roundhouse your way through
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Once a police officer caught Chuck Norris, the cop was lucky enough to escape with a warning.
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#176
James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator. However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
#416
A movie scene depicting Chuck Norris losing a fight with Bruce Lee was the product of history's most expensive visual effect. When adjusted for inflation, the effect cost more than the Gross National Product of Paraguay.
#546
Chuck Norris programs do not accept input.
#558
Chuck Norris once won a game of connect four in 3 moves.
#330
4 out of 5 doctors fail to recommend Chuck Norris as a solution to most problems. Also, 80% of doctors die unexplained, needlessly brutal deaths.
#272
It is better to give than to receive. This is especially true of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
#381
Chuck Norris was banned from competitive bullriding after a 1992 exhibition in San Antonio, when he rode the bull 1,346 miles from Texas to Milwaukee Wisconsin to pick up his dry cleaning.
#505
It works on my machine always holds true for Chuck Norris.
#231
Chuck Norris once pulled out a single hair from his beard and skewered three men through the heart with it.
#333
Chuck Norris' first job was as a paperboy. There were no survivors.
#190
Scotty in Star Trek often says "Ye cannae change the laws of physics. This is untrue. Chuck Norris can change the laws of physics. With his fists.
#276
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
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