Once a police officer caught Chuck Norris, the cop was lucky enough to escape with a warning. 325 359 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 48% approval (684 votes)
He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword. He who lives by Chuck Norris, dies by the roundhouse kick.
For undercover police work, Chuck Norris pins his badge underneath his shirt, directly into his chest.
When you play Monopoly with Chuck Norris, you do not pass go, and you do not collect two hundred dollars. You will be lucky if you make it out alive.
In ancient China there is a legend that one day a child will be born from a dragon, grow to be a man, and vanquish evil from the land. That man is not Chuck Norris, because Chuck Norris killed that man.
The term "Cleveland Steamer" got its name from Chuck Norris, when he took a dump while visiting the Rock and Roll Hall of fame and buried northern Ohio under a glacier of fecal matter.